So far I have been 100% successful at being immortal.

If you’re seeing this on Tumblr, click the “view on WordPress” link to see the full post.

 

Could you Russian spammers kindly fuck off? In case you haven’t noticed, this site is in English, so even if your stupid comments, whatever they are, got published, which they aren’t (I have to approve comments, and I never will approve this type), most of my readers won’t understand them.

 

Well, that’s one way to cut down on plastic pollution.
https://moon-child.net/supermarket-uses-embarrassing-plastic-bags-so-customers-will-remember-their-reusable-ones

And here’s another.

Because you could be consuming a credit card volume of plastic a week.
https://www.ctvnews.ca/health/you-consume-a-credit-card-a-week-of-tiny-plastic-study-1.4462854

 

Sleeping with a light on could lead to weight gain.
https://www.upi.com/Health_News/2019/06/10/Sleeping-with-a-light-on-could-lead-to-weight-gain-in-women/2601560194048/

 

Your dog gets stressed when you do.
http://blogs.discovermagazine.com/d-brief/2019/06/06/dogs-sense-human-emotions-anxiety-stress

 

There are some truly strange creatures inhabiting the depths.
https://www.boredpanda.com/deep-sea-creatures-photos-roman-fedortsov

 

 

 

 

 

If I saw some loser wearing these out in public, it would be hard to suppress the urge to step on their toes. A loser named Scotty Franklin is responsible for these crimes against humanity, and actually owns a business that manufactures them. http://redneckbootsandals.com/redneck-boot-sandals-original-customization-service/

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The fastest ever moving object was a manhole cover launched by a nuclear explosion.
https://www.businessinsider.com/fastest-object-robert-brownlee-2016-2

 

North Korea vs South Korea at night.

A little girl came running in the house and said, “Mommy, I met the most wonderful man this morning. It was the garbage man, and he was carrying a big bag over his head, and it broke and went all over him. And, you know, Mommy, he just stood there and talked to his mother, his son, and God.”

 

Two hillbillies walk into a restaurant. While having a bite to eat, they talk about their moonshine operation. Suddenly, a woman at a nearby table, who is eating a sandwich, begins to cough.
After a minute or so, it becomes apparent that she is in real distress. One of the hillbillies looks at her and says, “Kin ya swaller?” The woman shakes her head no. Then he asks, “Kin ya breathe?” The woman begins to turn blue, and shakes her head no. The hillbilly walks over to the woman, lifts up her dress, yanks down her drawers, and quickly gives her right butt cheek a lick with his tongue.
The woman is so shocked that she has a violent spasm, and the obstruction flies out of her mouth. As she begins to breathe again, the Hillbilly walks slowly back to his table. His brother said, “Ya know, I’d heard of that there Hind Lick Maneuver but I ain’t never seed nobody do it!”

 

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