Food has replaced sex in my life. Now I can’t even get into my own pants.



Well, Halloween is over, and the fucking Christmas related shit has already started to appear. Why do people get so damn excited over this shit?  And now, here it is, the 4th of November, and people are still posting Halloween shit. What, you had such an awesome night it took you 4 whole days to recover enough to brag about it?

How I feel:


My name must be on a list somewhere of people to scam, because I have just been the subject of another attempt. This time I got an email that was supposedly from the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation, saying that I was the beneficiary of 5 million dollars. Now why, I thought, would they contact me by email, and how would they even get my address? But I sent the information requested anyway: my home address and phone number. In response, I was told to contact a courier company in India, which also seemed strange. But the number provided was not in the typical 3-3-4 number format, so could not be completed. I have no idea what this kind of scam would benefit anyone, and I wish everyone involved would have something horrible happen to them.


It makes me wonder how people like this even get elected. Money, I guess,


Exactly how dumb are Americans? The U.S. Census Bureau removed Central and South American as birthplace options, because people from the Midwest and the South would mistakenly pick them.


This got me curious, so I took the quiz, although I already knew I wasn’t very kinky. Sure enough, my result was “vanilla”.


Apparently elephants like classical music.


A reticulated python perished in a wildfire, refusing to leave her eggs.





The world’s tallest statue was unveiled in India on October 31. It is almost twice as tall as the Statue of Liberty and is of a man named Vallabhbhai Patel, who was one of the leaders of the Indian National Congress during the struggle for Indian independence. It is 30 feet tall.







Sounds like my crowd, when we were younger. 



This asteroid is so hot metal would melt on its surface.


Video captured of Jupiter, Io and Europa during Cassini’s flyby.


YAY! The 426 Hemi is coming back! Who says money can’t buy happiness?






Nnnoooo! Some people seem to spend a lot of time thinking of ways to screw up a perfectly good vehicle.


I became fully aware last night that I’ve been spending entirely too much time with my computer. The first clue was when I noticed that my right hand is now permanently cramped into the famous “Microsoft Mouse” position. The second hint was a little more tragic. As I lay in bed last night looking at my wife, thinking how nice it would be to have sex with her, I rested my hand upon her breast and gently cupped it (having no choice, since my right hand is now permanently cramped). I heard a soft moan, but moments later she relegated me back to my side of the bed. Alas, I had double-clicked her nipple.


A poll shows that two out of five men would rather have love than money or health. Yeah, that’s what a woman wants; a broke sick guy.


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